young versus old

i'm going to start this post by asking you to please bear with me while i gather my thoughts on "young versus old." this phrase and idea popped into my head over the weekend, and i honestly have no idea where i'm going with it so allow me to resort to my old word-vomit ways. i promise it'll make sense by the time i sign off. maybe. i guess i was just thinking...

what's too young? what's too old? what's SO young? we hear these phrases all the time, no matter our age or where we're at in life. "oh, you're so young!" "he's too old to be doing that." "you're just too young." but are there certain AGES that we think define the cut-offs for this shit?

it's so funny because when you are actually YOUNG (i'm talking teens and earlier), 25 seems soooooo old. like you better be married and have three kids by 25 or what the hell have you been doing with your life?!!!? however, the older you get, the more you understand how completely psyhotic that thought-process is. you find yourself still crying over stupid shit at 25, still having no fucking idea what you're gonna do with your life at 25, and making teenage-level mistakes when you're 25. you realize you're still SO young and have a lot more to figure out.

but then that's not true for a lot of people. you would think this day in age and with the progression our society has made as a whole, the whole young marriage thing would be on the outs, but you'd be very wrong. 22, 23, 24 year olds are still rushing to that alter like their dress train is on fire. they don't want to be OLD parents (i.e. 30, 31). and although in your eyes their age mixed with marriage is terrifying and something you couldn't possibly fathom doing to yourself right now, you have those thoughts like "shit. am i running out of time? do they consider me a spinster?!"

when do you stop going out and partying? to any d-bag who just thought to himself, "UH NEVER" - you will never have a lasting relationship. i'm really asking - when is getting wasted to the point of blacking out just you looking pathetic and "too old" to be pulling that crap? i would say probably once you hit your 30s, but it just so happens i've become good friends with a handful of young 30-year-olds at my job and drinking with them feels just as natural if not moreso than drinking with people my exact age. dazed and confused had it right: "they keep getting younger, and we stay the same age."

how old is too old when it comes to dating someone who's older than you? and ain't it funny how sometimes dating older can end up feeling like dating much, much younger? perhaps that's why the person is "older" and single in the first place.

how young is too young to love or understand love? teenagers seem to be in love all the time. i thought my high school boyfriend was the end-all-be-all and went all anorexic and crazy when he broke up with me. now seeing pictures of him actually makes me gag, especially when i remember he explained the bumps on his weiner were just hair follicles. hey, buddy. you sure about that? because, uh, i've never felt a bumpy dick since you soooo....

what's too young or old to have kids? i know girls my age who have kids and even pregnant again! would i ever want that for myself at this age? HOW DARE YOU. i can barely handle it when i have three errands to do in one night - why would you EVER think i could manage children right now? but these girls who i know to have children seem put together - well, most of them.

when are you too old to be having sort of young fun? they say you always feel young inside. your body might sag in weird places and you're developing actual wrinkles, but you still get excited. you still find the joy in the smallest things that maybe "adults" shouldn't be so joyous about (i'll be damned if fun school supplies and candy stores don't get my inner child hyped up until the day i die). you can even find late love in life - you hear about it all the time. i don't think the human heart ever runs out of the will and ability to fall in love. i better be 90 and boning my husband on the reg or i'm gonna be PISSED.

god, what is my point here? i guess that age is relative. whether you're too young or too old depends on where you are in your life at the current moment and how intensely you are able to rationalize your actions to yourself. everyone sees age differently - for some, it's black and white and you better not be fucking around after a certain age. for others, it doesn't matter at all - everyone moves at their own pace so put that eyebrow back down and don't be so smug.

whatever your age, just do what feels right. timelines and "plans" only seem to get in the way. unless you're like 35, still not married, and hitting the bar scene constantly. people will judge. hard. or if you're 20 or 21 and getting married before college is over. or if you're 28 and still have never had a serious relationship. um. ok. i'll stop there.


- emma

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