oh instagram, how i love thee

the man repeller is the shit. if you don't know who i'm referring to, please go HERE before proceeding with reading this entry on my blog. obviously, i have no way of knowing whether or not you'll actually click on that "here" word and go educate yourself on the greatness that IS leandra medine, but God will know. and he'll smite you if you lie about it. earlier this week, TMR (that's an acronym for the man repeller) wrote one of the more on-point posts about what instagram filters say about you. i'd be lying if i said i wasn't almost literally kicking myself for not thinking of such a brilliant post before she did. i guess that's why she's famous :-/ (I'LL GET THERE ONE DAY!).

her callouts were pretty legit. here are some of the highlights:

"Lo-Fi: You’re dark around the surface, bright on your interior–a complex creature...you also make footwear (and professional photos not taken with an iPhone but filtered anyway,) look great."

"Earlybird, Sutro, Brennan: You drink so much coffee your body is becoming immune to the caffeine...that’s what you are, Earlybird, Sutro and Brennan–and speak quite accurately to whatever inklings of the pre-wi-fi life you are trying to preserve by filtering your photos back in time to 1952."

and, my personal favorite because i use this filter quite a bit:

"Valencia: Your subtlety is obvious, disposition admired. You don’t like to, nay, need to show off your photography skills but there is an air of arrogance about you. You... bask quite deeply in the self-indulgent glory of never having to prove yourself on Instagram.

whoops, i'm an instagram bitch. but i think we may have all knew that (if you follow me) (which you should?) (i try and keep it interesting...) (hi).

anyhow, her post inspired me to write my own post about instagram (although my first surge of emotion upon reading it was jealous rage). but not just any post - a love letter post. to my absolute most favorite app ever created thus far in this ever-growing, ever-evolving, ever-more simplistic technological world.

dearest instagram,

it wasn't until i met you that i felt whole. i numbly floated through my days checking facebook statuses and trying to conjure up clever enough tweets in hopes that perhaps 1 out of 100 would be retweeted. i tweeted at celebrities, trying to entertain myself with this 140 character prohibited app. but yet, i remained empty inside. sure, facebook and twitter both give you the ability to share pictures, but i'll be damned if i ever received more than 3 likes on a single picture in my facebook life. i was lost, instagram. lost until i found you.

at first, i wasn't sure what this newfound love was in my life. i wasn't sure how to categorize it because i didn't understand it. that's why my first ever picture was this:

a picture of my father - and in EARLYBIRD, nonetheless! something i rarely do nowadays. i was young and immature - i didn't know what you would really grow to mean to me, instagram. but you were patient and kind and stayed by my side, waiting for me to figure it all out. i knew i was getting there upon taking this shot:

a gorgeous picture of my gorgeous best friend. so many LIKES! so many COMMENTS! what was this? what was this incredible, instanseous praise and satisfaction? i had taken a good picture, made it even better with a delicious filter and people LIKED it. like, LOTS of people. like ELEVEN people. this was all the petting and instalove i needed to carry on and begin really understanding you - understanding how to manipulate you, hashtag you, and love you whole-heartedly.

you see, i have always loved photography. this is a hobby i started at a young age with disposal cameras while i was away at summer camp, which graduated into my first actual digital camera, and, even wilder, to my dad's NIKON that i used during my college photography class and learned to develop prints in the dark room. i have long been known to be the friend who takes all the pictures - friends act annoyed, but deep down i know they are thankful. how else would their entire college lives and thereafter be documented with such tenacity if it weren't for me? i know i can be annoying, instagram, but that's where you came into play. you showed me that it doesn't matter - i can post three to four pictures on you a day, and PEOPLE LIKE ME. it's a pseudo-photographer's dream come true - telling my entire day to the internets through pictures and witty captions, day in and day out

you give me the freedom i've always wanted to snap thousands of pictures (no, really. i am currently up to 1,278 photos) and feel no shame from it. and POO POO on the instagram-haters who claim that you can make ANYONE  a photographer. i am on my knees BEGGING to differ. i follow plenty of instagrammers who are still at a loss as to how to take a quality picture even with your exciting and glorious amount of filters you offer. i see blurry, completely pointless pictures every single day. you are no cheap trick, instagram - you require a little bit of talent behind your users in order to create magic and for that, i love you.

you have allowed me, WITHOUT SHAME, to:

learn the art of DIPTIC and split screen fun

show off my adventures in the kitchen

document my drunken blog undertakings and live to tell the tale

give examples to young fashionitas like myself on how to bargain shop

show off my new boyfriend

show off my new boyfriend's new puppy

spread the inspiration with a daily Outfit  Of The Day post (aka OOTD)

and, of course, promote my blog when i see fit

when i see my iPhone has an update for you, my heart skips a beat. "more filters?!" i excitedly think. you make my heart light, like a child who knows no hatred or harm or upset - just purity and joy and the strong desire for candy all the time. you have allowed me to be who i really am at my core - a girl, who loves taking pictures, and pretty things, and herself, and attention. and food.

you have my heart forever, instagram. unless some other more amazing photo app comes along, but i highly doubt it. you're safe for now. 

forever yours, in mostly lo-fi, x-pro and rise,